One Who I Can Count On

Your best friends are there for you through anything, they lift you higher when you feel like falling, they hold your hand through rough times, they whisper into your ear that "you can do it" when you feel like turning back. True  friends are the ones you can trust, and who can trust you. 

You never really find out who your true friends are until something crazy happens and you really need them... I have recently encountered an issue in which you really find out who is there for you though everything. There have been some people who have amazed me in how easy they turned their back, and others that have really stuck it out with me, answering calls at one am just because I needed to talk. Yet it seems like the ones who turn their backs are the ones your heart aches for the most when they are not around. Why is that?

Ralph Waldo Emerson once said that "A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him I may think aloud." That really made me think, can I be completely sincere to every one of my friends and know that they will still love me and not judge? And if not, are they worth keeping? Are the friends I have ones that trust me unconditionally and are they people I can trust no matter what?

"As we grow up we don't lose friends. We just learn who our real ones are."

Two friends in particular comes to mind as a write this, one who I can count on... And one, who I find I no longer can. Finding out I can no longer confide and trust the second friend has hurt so much more than ever expected. More than loosing any boyfriend or material object I have ever had. This person was someone I shared everything with and felt so at peace when they were around, but maybe as the quote states, they were never really a real friend, and I just found that out. 

The Hunt

There are two things to aim at in life; first to get what you want, and after that to enjoy it. Only the wisest of mankind has achieved the second.
- Logan Pearsall Smith

It's so funny to me that some people work and work and work for something they really want only to decide after they get it that it wasn't what they wanted after all or maybe they start working towards something else they want and never have time to enjoy the first thing. But I suppose that is human nature right? To try to get everything you want in life. At what cost does that come though? 

I have been told time and time again that men prefer the chase to having the thing/person. We were all naturally bread to hunt and track down the things we need and want, so in our society now a days where we can look up a number and call to get almost anything we may desire, the hunt has been taken out of life. Any chance we have to regain that natural calling we take.

For example, when dating, the two people will do almost anything to please the other and chase them down until they agree to be with them. After that fact though when they have the agreement and the commitment, it seems way less fun. There is no more spontaneity or fun work in the relationship. This plateau is where most relationships end, when one or both parties get bored of the simple commitment. Thus, making it hard to maintain a long term relationship. 

So what can we do? How do we avoid this plateau effect on our relationships? To me the answer is this -  Never stop trying to work for your partner. However long you happen to have been in a relationship with someone, don't take it as a guarantee that person is "yours". You still need to work to keep them and yourself interested and intrigued, still chase them and take them out. Treat them as though you are still trying to win their affection and heart. I have been using the word "work" often here I realize and some of you may be cringing at that thinking "a relationship is suppose to be fun! Not work!" I am not saying work as in dig a crazy trench around their house and fill it with alligators to protect them, work as in go out of your way to do little things you know they appreciate, or just spend time with them when it's not expected... or even just send them a little text letting them know you are thinking about them. 

So - work, chase, and be married (see what I did there)  

Another Place

Hey y'all, I am going to be posting more often in my other blog http://twisteroffate.blogspot.com as the trip approaches, so if your looking to read more about my feelings and excitement about my leaving for Guatemala you will find it there =)
I will probably still post occasionally here but the majority of my posts for the next 3 months will be there.

It's Getting Closer!

That day I have been waiting for since August 6th is getting closer! I have ever felt so passionate about anything in my life. Ever since that day 4 years ago when I walked into the city on my first trip to Guatemala I knew this is where I was called to be. The country overwhelmed me, the people, the sights, the smells, the sounds... all so out of the ordinary for us here in North America  but I strangely felt so at home. At peace with myself. I remember the first thing I said when I got off of our bus and stepped into the center and saw the kids, I looked at my mom and asked "When are we coming back?" Those kids have touched my heart in a way I never thought possible. They come from so many different backgrounds and yet they are so the same, as are we. We walk into their halls thinking we are going to make such a difference... Sure we may paint the building or cook up some food, but the kids touch you and forever leave a hand print on your soul.

I cannot wait to get my little Sandra in my arms again.. I know she has been waiting for me. I hear from my best friend there that every time she goes to see the kids Sandra asks her "when will miss Ella come back?" But what she doesn't know what everyday I ask the same question... "when will I get to go back?!" I have gotten the pleasure of watching Sandra grow up from a lovely little 2 year old to a gorgeous, smart 6 year old. What I would give to be able to see her everyday and tell her in person that I love her and wish the best for her.

29 days until I will be on that airplane on my way to that precious country, 29 days until I get to be with the people I really love, 29 days until I see the sight and smell the smells, 29 days till I will truly feel at home.

                                                                     Sandra age 2

                                                                     Sandra age 3 1/2

                                                      Sandra age 4 1/2 (little girl to far right)

                                                                    Sandra age 5

Sandra age 6